Tall tales (and true)

["Paul" <morbieus@hotmail.com>]

Anybody got any good "tall stories". Here is one told to me some years ago
which I love to repeat.

Back in the 50's there was often a run from Kalgoorlie to Perth that had an
"armoured" van to carry the gold. Now, this part of the world is not
exactly known for cool summers and air conditioning was a distant dream. 
The story goes that the 2 guards of this "bullion" one 100 degree
(Farenheit) day were sweltering in this steel van with little to relieve
them on the long journey until one pulled out a bottle of scotch.
Unfortunately, like them, the scotch was pretty much on the boil.
Anyway, they scratched their heads for a while before approaching the train
guard and asking him if there was any chance he might be able to find a way
for them to cool the scotch.
"Ill see what I can do" came the reply.
Shortly later he returned with a large chunk of ice, much to there
surprise, but they gratefully accepted it and settled down for a little
nip. Anyway, in this oven the ice did not last long and the scotch was soon
on the boil again, so they decided to seek out the guard to see if he could
get them some more of that ice.
"Ill see what I can do" he said again, and shortly he returned with another
large chunk. They marvelled at his almost magical powers to produce this
stuff in the middle of a desert but quickly went about pouring another nip.
They were still parched a little later and thought they would press their
luck with the train guard again and asked him if he could get them just one
more chunk of that beautiful cooling ice.
"naah, I dont think Id better....", he said, "...the body's beginning to
show!"