RailCrack News

[billboltonREMOVE-TO-EMAIL@computer.org (Bill Bolton)]

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RailCrack Announces National Lottery Bid

Railway operator RailCrack has today announced a surprise late bid to 
run the national lottery. "We've been running a bloody lottery on the 
rail network for years", said Ronnie Corbett, RailCrack's Chief 
Executive, "so this is a natural progression".

Under the proposals, a player will buy a `season ticket to make five 
return journeys a week at peak times. "You nominate timetabled trains 
for each day, and if all ten come in on time and in one piece you win 
the jackpot", he said, "a reserved seat in first class for the rest 
of your life, or a year, whichever is shorter".

Corbett confirmed that RailCrack were going to be giving over a 
significant amount of money to good causes: ".... things like leaves
on the line, floods and vandalism - These are good causes that we can 
blame on other people, as opposed to bad causes like dodgy track or 
faulty signalling, which we're in danger of being held responsible 
for ourselves".

RailCrack is the main player in the Crashalot consortium formed for 
the franchise bid. Other backers include US software giant MicroShaft 
who promise to put in new machines that make buying a ticket a 
lottery in itself. Crashalot are also planning a special `Rollover' 
game, where players pick the next scheduled train service they think 
will roll over. 

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Cheers,

Bill