"Shittyrail" Brochure

["Mitch" <this.is.not.my@address.postoffice.net>]

The actual thing was made in Publisher and it looks better than what you'll
see here

Front page
Cityrail
WE’LL GET YOU THERE ALRIGHT
© by someone who wishes to remain anonymous
[pic from David Johnson's website of two tangaras one toppled]



Next Page
No fatalities… in July
Cityrail trains are very safe, and they will hardly ever crash…
Well nobody’s perfect.
[pic from DJ's website of two tincan type trains, destroyed]



Next Page
The World’s Most Modern Trains
Cityrail continuously works on their rolling stock. Our trains are the most
modern and are the very safest in the world.

If you don’t believe us, we’ll kill you.
[pic of steam train - DJ's website]
[caption: "A suburban train"]



Next Page
Safest form of land transportation in Sydney
Well you can’t blame us for trying can you… everyone knows that it is safer
to walk… much better for the environment and for your health and well being…
That’s why we raise our finge… I mean prices every year.
[pic of Tangara on truck - DJ's website]
[caption: "if all else fails..."]



Next Page
WANNA CATCH A TRAIN?
Don’t bother, we are never on time

OTHER WAYS TO MAKE MONEY
This year, Cityrail has discusses ways to make more money. Some ideas that
have been proposed are:
Sell off everything, the whole lot.
Halve the trains, double the fares.
Halve the staff, halve the wage.
Encourage public transport usage.
[pic of Tangara on its side - DJ's website]
[caption: "I SAID DON'T PRESS THE RED BUTTON!"]

Next Page
[pic of Waterfall? incident: tin-can train "folded". DJ's website]
[caption: "ouch"]
[pic of Waterfall? incident: zoomed out version. DJ's website]
[caption: "oops"]


End brochure

David Johnson's website is at
www.tacobell.com.au/~trainman
[NO JOKE! GO THERE]



"Dave Proctor" <daproc@spambait.ozemail.com.au> wrote in message
eEaF4.559$9k5.376258@news0.optus.net.au">news:eEaF4.559$9k5.376258@news0.optus.net.au...
| Mitch wrote in message ...
| >Reminds me of the time when I made a "ShittyRail" brochure. Quite
humorous.